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Self Contained
Making friends, working hard, and actively pursuing personal goals.
Mon Apr 8 2002 3:28pm
 
The Christmas Time Suicide Balloon
CONSUMER ALERT: Are our Christmas Time Suicide Balloons safe?
Fri Dec 14 2001 2:24pm
Nobody Came To My Winter Solstice Party
I'm not accusing anyone, just asking why and what gives.
Mon Nov 5 2001 9:49pm
Rhapsody In Yellow
Weather supercenter forecast: clear skies with light patches of severe thunderstorms.
Tue Oct 30 2001 10:00am
The Chinese Sticks
For my first trick, I must ask for nothing less than complete silence.
Mon Oct 22 2001 1:39am
There's A Girl I Like
Prayer thoughts for high school boys of dating age.
Mon Oct 22 2001 1:34am
 
Manage Your Web Dollars!
Understanding Cyberspace presents a rotating panel of tech leaders and industry professionals.
Mon Oct 22 2001 1:30am
Banana Peel Snarls Southbound Lanes
The first victim was a 21 year old perfume and fragrance retailer.
Mon Oct 22 2001 1:30am
You Sure Are Stupid
A collection of found photographs with accompanying poignant sentiment.
Mon Oct 22 2001 12:26am
Crashing and Burning
Yes! We have recommendations for you in tech support jokes, abortion gags, and toilet humor.
Sun Oct 21 2001 1:37am
The Javascript Doctor
I'm back, refreshed - and ready to tackle your questions! Won't you open your hearts and let me in?
Thu Oct 18 2001 11:22pm
 
 
WARNING: BONERS LOOSE IN THE FINANCIAL DISTRICT
 

1.
Obtain a fresh, sharpened pencil or chopstick.


2.
Stab it hard and fast, clean through one end of a Pringles can.

Kids: have an adult hold the can.

3.
Thread through each hole a length of cheerful yarn, along which you've strung a small counterweight.

4.
A washer, your car keys, whatever. Anything with weight, and a hole wide enough for string.

I'm using my pager, which hasn't gone off in eight months. I think it needs a new battery.

A Instring aperture
B Outstring aperture
C Balance drift chamber
D Source length
E Tassle length
F Opaque adhesive
G Counterweight
H White endcap adornment
I Translucent adhesive
J Pringles lid


Wrap white paper around each end. Use black electrical tape to seal two cans together in a continuous tube.

 

 

5.
Stay focused!

After many hours in the magic lab architecting one wand, you probably won't be in the mood to produce a second one. But therein lies the whole point, I guess.

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